Goin’ Downtown

   To go downtown or not to go downtown—why is this question so difficult for women to answer? 

    I understand why men waffle on the subject, silver-tongued, cunning linguists that they are. It’s the fear of an untamed bush, funky spunk, an unexpected red tide, bad smells, and probably the most popular fear, which is not knowing exactly what the hell to do once one wanders into the nether regions of our womanhood. 

    What I wonder, though, is why some women don’t ask for it or why some feel they are imposing on their partners by asking for oral sex? I’ve never heard of a man having problems asking a woman to do a particular job, have you? So, what’s the female hang up? 

    In my younger years, I fell into this trap, too, feeling insecure about my body and its natural goings-on, and then I wasn’t necessarily sure I liked it, or that he would like it, until I met a certain older man who made it come alive for me. Since then, I haven’t looked back and my rule is this: If you won’t go down on me, I am finished with you. Period. 

    There are a few common sense rules you can employ to be more confident when asking for oral sex from your partner.

1. Keep the lady parts accessible and super clean. You want him to go muff diving, not fishing!
2. Do you get as good as you give? No better example of a quid pro quo situation than this one. Demand it because you deserve it. 
3. Can’t decide who goes first? 69 is always fine. You and your partner can pleasure each other simultaneously, and what a time saver! (Hey…I’m nothing if not practical, right?!?)
4. Everyone needs help sometimes, but it’s best to use a gentle approach. In your best sexy, bedroom voice tell him what you like and where you like it, grabbing him by the digits if necessary. Reassure him by telling him he can’t do it wrong, especially if you are telling him what feels right. 

The trip downtown should be a pleasure cruise, not a ride on the ​Titanic. It’s not something to be bargained for or forced upon someone; it’s an expression of love and care for your partner. Men have been asking, expecting, and receiving this pleasure for a long time.

​So, if he’s getting what he wants, why shouldn’t you? ​