Hope is Hot

     Hope can be a slippery little mother fucker. It’s a golden thread that can pull you out of the foulest of places, or a delicate rope that you unintentionally hang yourself with. We can survive without a lot of things—the internet, alcohol, sex (gasp!)—but hope is not one of them. Hope is not wishful thinking or an emotion, but it is a skill that some people parlay into their being that is…well…totally freaking hot. 

     I’ve made mistakes in my life and I have regrets, but not once have I lost all hope. Pessimistic people are no fun in life—or love. I’m not talking about venting with your bestie or your lover; everyone needs that. What I mean is people who tell themselves the victim story—all the time. Hear me out: shit goes awry, and it can happen more often than we want or can anticipate.  The mistake a lot of people make is getting stuck in the same story: Things always happen this way. I guess I’ll never get what I truly want. It’s going to be just another shitty day, week, month, year, decade. life, etc.

     Change your mindset to one of abundance, to one of blessings, even if they’re just blessings or abundance in the moment. Changing your mindset can have a lot of benefits such as lower rates of depression, more positive emotions, fewer feelings of loneliness; there are  physical health benefits, too: reduced rates of cancer, chronic illnesses, and fewer sleep problems. So, Stella, (you may be wondering)…what does all this have to do with sex? Well, gentle reader, if you’re sleeping well, healthy, and feeling good about life, your sex is going to be way better, and better for your partner, too. Boning up is more than…well…the physical function. There’s a lot of psychology to good sex (especially for women), and being hopeful makes you seem sexy to your partner, and heck…if you seem sexy you’re probably going to feel pretty sexy. 
     So, bone up on finding blessings in the half-full glass. That shit is sexy. Y’all, hope is hot!


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